- Many attorneys have big egos and don’t want to admit they need help. They are afraid they will look weak and not competent.
- Many attorneys don’t want to admit that they actually had lots of help just graduating from Law School, passing the Bar and finding work. They actually feel they did it all on their own when in fact, family, teachers and others provided much needed help along the way.
We have all run into people who have real trouble with commitment. And NO I don’t just mean men about marriage. I find the ones even more irritating that say YES to a goal or project but only last a week or so before being no longer committed. Even more frustrating are the passive aggressive types who keep saying yes but never do any work on the goal or project.
We all sometimes commit to too much and we have to withdraw. It is perfectly acceptable to explain your reasons once you see the error of taking on the assignment in the first place. This is the adult way of handling the escape.
But let’s look at the mere fact of a belief that you could never be over committed. What a thought! There is that saying that “it is best to give a job to a very busy person because they will get it done”. This holds true because that “very busy person” is usually brilliant at TIME MANAGEMENT.
- I don’t ask for help because I don’t need it.
- I can figure it out by myself.
- I have the internet and I can look up anything I need to know.
One of the first ways is, of course, by sharing space. In this scenario you simply rent a space with communal areas that you share. This is usually a waiting room, kitchen, copier, etc. You split the rent.
As Steve Jobs said: “I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today? And whenever the answer has been NO for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something”.
This actually sounds like a great idea. That question should give you a good idea if you are at least contented with your work. If not, then just answering NO, even if it is only to the mirror, is not a solution.
There are several steps you need to take:
Purpose, Autonomy and Mastery spells PAM. We could make a logo of that and carry it around to remind us each day that if those three elements can be attained , then we will be doing much better in our lives.
I’m thinking that this is the right order. That we need to find the Purpose first. Is the purpose a biggie like: “What is my purpose on earth?” or something small like:”What is the purpose of my work?” or even smaller as: “What is the purpose of my being in school?”. Some answers will come quickly, other not so quickly. Probably the ones that take longer to come up with are more important?
After that we need to look at Autonomy.…learning to do things ourselves. If we define the purpose of our work is to “advocate for people who are in trouble” then we have to find out what that means in each of our daily lives. Yours is probably very different from mine, even though we say we have the same Purpose.